Uncle Angus.

I know that I don't remember you, but I know you were a good sport, always looking out for the twins. Dionne was the apple of your eye, and she'll be devestated. i wish I could take your place, and you could live. So soon after Auntie Sharon's wedding. Everyone thought you would be okay after they cut the cancer away. Why would fate play the same cruel joke twice? Gran, Grandad, almost everyone. I just hope you aren't in too much pain. I hope you don't suffer. I can't bear it.

I can't open my mouth to speak. I open my mouth, but no sound comes out. Everyone's asking me why I won't speak, but how can I tell them? How do I tell them that my Great Uncle is dying of a cancer that we thought had been removed?

Everything I touch turns to dust. Marina. She's gone. Another person I loved, gone. Why me? Stephen and Tudor told me earlier I should have gone home. Mum doesn't even know how upset I am. She wouldn't understand. Nobody does.

How I wish I could come up to see you one last time. Or to come to the funeral.

Today was torture. I just can't focus. I want to break down and cry, and never stop.

Who can I turn to? I don't know who to trust.

What should I do?

I'd give anything to make it okay again, I really would. But I can only make things worse.